Pretty Niquey Blog 

Fitting in; Religious Divides

 

“I’m sorry, but your religion sounds stupid.”

No one, especially a child should hear that something they believe in is stupid. My religion is Holiness. One God, one faith, one baptism. And while it isn’t mainstream like Islam or Christianity, it is in the Bible.

“Ye shall be holy; for I am holy;” Leviticus chapter 11 verse 44.

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Before this happened, I was fragile, wondering why no one had heard of my religion. Ever since I was a little girl I loved going to church. You would find me happily clapping my hands as the preacher slayed the organ. Then I would listen intently on the words that he spoke, feeling God speak through him even though I was just a child. I had a lot of energy and enthusiasm and wasn’t afraid to show it. I was criticized for that. For awhile, church did seem like a dream, only because I had to go back to school the next day and receive harsh looks from other students.

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They prodded me like an experiment. “She looks different from us. Why does she wear long skirts? You can’t wear pants? They make pants for girls too!” or  “What’s that thing on her head?” they’d ask. “Why doesn’t she celebrate any holidays?” they questioned. “I believe in God, but we don’t have to do all of that.” All I could do was shake my head. They didn’t understand what they were doing.

 

(Editor’s note/addition) [They even asked me would I go to church when I was grown. I said yes, but I thought to myself, “Would I?” I wanted to, but I saw so many people leave and started panicking because I wondered if I would end up like them. I didn’t want to leave this church. I felt God around me even though I wasn’t filled with the Holy Ghost (I’m still seeking). I heard the scriptures being taught and I knew what the preacher was telling me was right. I decided I wanted to hold onto God, even if it was by a string. I have felt like that many a day. I felt so weak at times and didn’t want to say anything because I was embarrassed that I was even getting like this. I kept calling on God to help me and not too long after he would lift me up with the Word. It made my faith stronger. I want to stay.]

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Then one day I decided to brush off all the comments. I decided that no one would understand me or my faith unless they went to the church and read the Bible for themselves. Everything I believed in was in the Bible! So I just said the basics of my religion, hoping it would be enough for them to leave me alone. I knew most of them weren’t really curious. They weren’t my friends. They only asked me to make me uncomfortable. This continued through high school. When I was a freshman, I decided I didn’t care about not being popular. I stayed true to myself and noticed that people gave me more respect. Once I graduated high school, I felt like I could finally breathe. I was no longer trapped.  Now when people ask me about my religion, I can talk about it without feeling judged. Even share the Youtube links that direct viewers to our telecast.

 

Nowadays people have this respect for religions and will actually have a polite discussion about their faith. I’m not judged now because it’s common for people to dress modestly. I don’t care about what people think. I’m more expressive with my head coverings. I wear long, beautiful dresses and people give me compliments on my style. Now, I don’t try to fit in. Because I know that I can’t. My personality doesn’t allow me to. I’m at my best when I’m myself.